[GLORIA ESTEFAN'S "GO AWAY"
PLAYING]
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Do it, yeah ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Do it, yeah ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Do it, yeah ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Come on, come on ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Just go away now ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Come on, just go ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Come on, you know now ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Just go away now ♪
[BICYCLE BELL RINGS]
♪ Come on, just go ♪
[BICYCLE BELL RINGING]
♪ Go away ♪
♪ Won't you just go away? ♪
♪ Go away ♪
♪ Don't you
Come back one day ♪
♪ Just go away now ♪
♪ Take your stuff ♪
♪ All of your
Precious things ♪
♪ Leave right now ♪
♪ Know what tomorrow brings ♪
♪ Just go away now ♪
♪ Stay away ♪
♪ Won't you
Please stay away? ♪
♪ Live your life ♪
♪ Live it real far away ♪
♪ Just go away now ♪
♪ Save yourself ♪
♪ No way to get it all ♪
♪ Look around ♪
♪ The writing
Is on the wall ♪
♪ Just go away now ♪
♪ Aww! ♪
[BICYCLE BELL RINGING]
[TIRES SCREECH
AND HORNS HONK]
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Do it, yeah ♪
[SARAH HUMMING]
[SARAH SINGING INDISTINCTLY]
[BELL RINGING]
Whoa!
♪ Go away
Won't you just go away? ♪
♪ Go away ♪
♪ Don't you come
Back one day ♪
♪ Just go away now ♪
♪ Take your stuff ♪
♪ All of
Your precious things ♪
Hi.
[CHUCKLES]
And when you go
I won't miss you at all
[BICYCLE BELL RINGS]
And when you go
I'll be having a ball
Hey, morning, Sarah.
You will see
Thoughts of you
Won't ever cross my mind
[TIRES SCREECH]
MAN:
Watch it, lady!
♪ But people have
The right to party ♪
♪ And you won't let them
Have their fun ♪
♪ See you, wouldn't want
To be you ♪
♪ Toodle-oo,
Goodbye, shalom ♪
WOMAN: Hi, Sarah.
How you doing?
♪ But people have
The right to party ♪
♪ And we're not waiting
Till you're gone ♪
[HORN HONKS]
Slow down!
MAN:
Whoa!
♪ Fare thee well
Adios, so long ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Come on, go, now ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Just go away now ♪
♪ Come on, come on
Come on, go, now ♪
♪ Just go ♪
♪ Ciao, bye-bye
Hasta la vista ♪
♪ Fare thee well
Adios, so long ♪
♪ Aw! ♪
[LIP SYNCHING TO RECORDING]
♪ Somewhere ♪
♪ Over the rainbow ♪
Morning.
Mm. You're getting crumbs
on my counter.
What will be, will be.
Excuse me. Can I get
a little space here?
Oh, excuse us!
Well, get out
of the way.
Attitude.
Oh, for me? Thank you!
[AFRICAN MUSIC PLAYING]
No, not for you. Thank you.
Oh, do we have to
listen to this horrible
jungle music Christine?
Do you have to work here?
Yes, I do.
Is somebody twisting your arm?
Yes, you are.
It would be bad luck
if at least one day a week
you didn't have
a real African queen
working on the premises.
Stop humping at me.
Don't do it again.
I still say I should
wear the crown.
I'm gonna slap the sh--
Welcome to the African Queen.
Come right in, ladies. This way.
Thank you.
Ooh, I love this.
Thank you.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
TEACHER:
Okay, listen up.
Open your books to page 600.
About 602 you're gonna find
an illustration
on blood and the vascular--
Reuben, enough with the
graffiti. Into the biology, huh?
[STUDENTS CHATTERING]
ZORA:
Give me your finger.
Whoa! Quit grabbing me, girl.
Just give me your finger.
[WHIMPERING]
[SCREAMS]
Aah! You cut me!
[STUDENTS LAUGH]
Keep it down, gang.
Something funny?
Tell your mothers.
TEACHER:
Mr. Jackson wants everyone
to know how pleased he is
with the turnout for
the condom demonstration
and dispersal.
Yes. Go figure.
I'm type O.
♪ O, O, O, O, O ♪
Stop, silly.
TEACHER:
When you're finished with your
blood type turn to page 158.
You are, da dow...
AB.
Let's do it again.
Why?
Something's wrong.
What?
[ZORA SIGHS]
I'm AB.
[♪♪♪]
TEA CAKE:
Zora.
Zora, what's the matter?
Zora!
[♪♪♪]
[ENGINE STARTS]
Is that good? Okay.
I'm going to--
Mom!
What are you doing
home from school?
Ma, you lied to me.
What are you talking about?
Before dad died,
you had an affair.
You slept with someone else.
Thank God this happened
on one of my work days.
Shut up.
Your blood type is A,
Charlie's was O,
and I just came out AB.
Ma, that is not
genetically possible.
[GASPS]
Look, why don't we
go somewhere
and talk about this quietly?
Come on, okay?
Ohh!
Oh. Excuse me.
I'm terr--
Take care of this.
Wait. You don't
have to go anywhere.
Ma, it was a sperm bank.
That is undignified.
Well, maybe to some people,
but, hey, I'd just lost
the biggest love of my life.
I thought maybe I could
make myself another.
Sit down.
And I did,
and I got you.
I never wanted you
to find out like this, Zora.
I really wanted to
tell you before this.
I just...
I was chicken.
And I'm sorry,
because this was not
the right way for you
to find out.
It's okay.
You sure?
It's okay.
Okay.
[SIGHS]
You have no idea
who the guy was?
No.
I mean, the door opened,
the tray came in,
he was this tall. Okay?
Ma!
What?
It was in a little vial.
I didn't know what to say.
It didn't speak.
How could I know
who it was?
I didn't care. I asked for
the best they had.
You know, black, smart,
not too tall.
All the things you are.
And look what they made.
They made magic.
They made you.
So you bought sperm.
Yes! Yes!
I bought the sperm.
Uhh! Uhh!
[BOTH LAUGH]
How much did it cost?
Why?
I just want to know.
Are you gonna buy some?
No.
[LAUGHS]
It doesn't matter.
Come on.
Would you feel better
if I said it was free?
Somebody just handed it to
me on the street
and I used it at home?
It doesn't matter.
But Ma,
I could have a father.
Let me tell you something.
You had a father,
and his name was Charlie.
And he was the best.
He was great.
Life is great.
Okay?
Okay.
Okay!
Okay.
Hey. Are you sure you
even want a father?
I mean, they can be
real assholes sometimes.
You don't have to do this.
I'm prepared to go alone.
No, no, that ain't it.
Besides, I might meet
my future father-in-law.
Tea Cake, please.
TEA CAKE:
You're the one that said
you wanted to marry me.
ZORA:
Yeah, but I was 7!
TEA CAKE:
Yeah, well,
you was a mature 7.
ZORA:
Just be my friend, Tea.
Boyfriends come and go.
TEA CAKE:
Baby, I'll come and go.
Where do we start?
ZORA:
Heh, you nasty.
TEA CAKE:
Take advantage of this.
I might not live down the street
for the rest of your life.
ZORA:
Take the first exit
off the bridge.
TEA CAKE:
A'ight.
ZORA:
Left. Make a left
at the light.
At some point you have
to tell me where we going.
I ain't following you around
like some honeydew sucker.
Why not? You've been
doing it for years.
Are the rules
suddenly changing?
TEA CAKE:
Just tell me what the sign on
the building is going to say.
ZORA:
California Cryobank.
TEA CAKE:
What kind of bank is that?
ZORA:
It's a sperm bank.
TEA CAKE: I'm making a U-turn.
ZORA: No! Wait.
It's right there, Tea.
For 17 years,
I thought he was dead.
But it's not true.
But I have a father.
Oh, I see. So you think you're
just gonna walk up and say,
"Uh, excuse me, 17 years ago
a man came in to make a deposit.
He looked
a little like me, maybe?"
Be quiet.
"Could you give me
his name and number,
because he's my daddy."
Honeydew, shut up.
Can I help you?
Yes. Uh, I have a friend
who's interested in donating.
No, you don't!
He's a little shy.
Surely. For today, he needs
to fill out the forms
and leave blood
and sperm samples.
Only 15 percent of applicants
end up becoming donors.
If he qualifies,
he will be paid
$40 per donation,
with no more than three deposits
allowed per week.
Hmm.
ZORA:
Thank you.
Hey, come on, Z,
I can't just go in there
and wrestle with
the bald-headed champ.
What's the big deal?
It's not like
you've never done it before.
Uh-- that's my business.
Are you ready?
Mm-mm, mm-mm, mm-mm.
[DOOR BUZZES]
[IN SLO-MO VOICE]
We have magazines
as well as videotapes.
Which would you prefer?
[♪♪♪]
Um, the videotapes,
please.
[GASPS]
This way, please.
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
He'll have to do
the rest alone.
Oh, I just need to
use the bathroom.
Second door on the right.
Thanks.
Mommy.
Come on, man!
[♪♪♪]
MAN:
Oh. Oh, yeah,
now we're talking!
Sorry.
No creams or lotions.
They get into the sample.
Don't grab the sink
during collection.
One man ripped it off the wall.
We pay by volume.
You must reach the top line
even to be considered.
Damn!
Any questions?
Well, yeah. I was--
[WHIMPERING]
How am I supposed to
fill this up?
I can't fill it.
[WHIMPERS]
WOMAN:
Good motility.
MAN:
Yeah, it's very good.
WOMAN:
Count's up from last time.
[MAN & WOMAN
SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
[HUMMING]
[TAPPING NOISE]
I ain't doing it.
[DOOR KNOB RATTLES]
NURSE:
Is somebody in there?
[WOMAN MOANING ON TV]
WOMAN:
Oh, it feels so good.
Oh!
Oh, God.
Oh!
[WOMAN & MAN MOANING ON TV]
NURSE:
Oh, this key!
[GASPS]
What are you doing here?
I thought this was
the bathroom.
I'm calling security.
ZORA:
I didn't do anything!
Nurse,
I need another cup.
Zora!
Where you going?
I found my father.
[MAN & WOMAN MOANING]
[BOTH PANTING]
Heaven.
Hea--
[CHUCKLES]
Oh!
Up I go. Down I go.
Up I go. Down...
Oh, God.
They're getting whiter.
They're getting whiter!
You should bleach
your teeth!
I swear it's so cool!
HAL:
Oh, yeah. Good idea, sweetheart.
[DEEP PURPLE'S
"SMOKE ON THE WATER"
BLARING OVER STEREO]
[COUGHS]
♪ We ended up at
The Grand Hotel ♪
♪ It was empty
Cold and bare ♪
[GROANS]
Rise and shine,
Mr. Bunny-butt.
Hmm? Oh.
Wait a minute, honey.
There you go.
♪ The whitest teeth
In the world ♪
♪ I have the biggest closet
In the world ♪
Hello. I'm dressed.
I'm leaving.
Kiss goodbye.
Okay. That's enough.
Step class in 20 minutes.
Bye.
[GASPING]
[ENGINE STARTS]
[GARAGE DOOR OPENING]
Ooh. Very young.
Very cute. Heh-heh.
Hello, there.
Can I help you?
Hi. I'm looking for,
uh, Hal Jackson.
Well, look no further.
Is he inside?
You're talking to him.
To Halbert Jackson?
The one and only.
You're white.
Well, that's true,
darling.
But when we're alone
in the dark,
what difference
is that gonna make?
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
No, see, I'm looking for
the Halbert Jackson
whose, um, social security
number is 540-82-9789.
Are you a process server?
What's that?
Did my ex-wife
send you?
Goddamn it. We settled all that
alimony shit last year.
No more legal crap.
She agreed.
No, wait! Wait!
I'm sorry, but I don't know
anything about your ex-wife.
Oh. Hell, I'm late.
Don't get me wrong.
I think we're good together.
We got a thing,
a connection,
but, uh, I gotta go.
If you wanna keep talking,
hop on in here.
Make up your mind. I gotta
get to work. Coming or going?
Well, that's a shame.
No!
Aw, there you go.
Heh, all right.
[♪♪♪]
[HORN HONKS]
Where do you work?
Jackson Motors.
"Because real cowboys
are strong and tough.
"So are American trucks.
And don't forget
Hal's your pal."
What'd you say
your name was again?
ZORA:
Uh, Zora.
Zora Mathews.
Are you the young lady Daryl's
been telling us about?
I don't think anyone's
told you about me.
[CHUCKLES]
Hey, Diego!
Front and center!
Oh, my.
[GAGGING]
Lady over there
laughing at the ground.
Ah, women.
Gotta love them.
Morning, boss.
You're late.
Well, of course
I'm late, Teddy.
Hello there, folks.
How y'all doing?
Jesus Christ. A bear?
You said llama.
We did a focus group.
Bears are really big right now.
Boris is
getting restless, Ted.
You better go
put on your suit.
Now this is bullshit,
Teddy.
We're done with circus.
You promised me barnyard.
Chickens, cows.
Who is this guy?
He's the trainer.
You liked the zebra.
Hell,
I liked the zebra.
You loved the chimp.
Little Larry.
Larry? Yeah,
I liked Larry.
Couldn't drive worth shit,
but I liked him.
The bear's gotta work now.
He hasn't eaten yet.
HAL:
What happened to--
TEDDY: Nothing.
The light's total shit!
We had a 7:00 call!
What's the problem?
Why are we using
this asshole?
I told you I never wanted
to see him again.
We're shooting
a truck commercial.
He thinks it's Gone
With the Goddamn Wind!
What does that mean? The bear
hasn't eaten? Hey, Jose!
JOSE:
Morning, chief.
It's technical.
Technical, my ass.
Hello there, Bobby!
Don't give 'em away.
Oh! Red light!
Hey, how you doing?
I'm doing great.
Green light. Selling cars
is what you do,
advertising is what I do.
Will you please
put on the suit?
The bear's on the clock.
You're killing me.
Yeah, yeah.
Hi. Listen, we're getting
40 new trucks in an hour.
Laura's going for take-out.
What do you want?
Uh, three packs of Marlboros
and some cheese.
Yeah. Some cheese.
[SIGHS]
You okay?
Much better.
Are you the girl Daryl
was telling us about?
No, you couldn't be her.
Uh...
[BEAR GROWLS]
Thank you.
Uh-huh.
TEDDY:
He's done this before, right?
TRAINER:
Stand back, now.
Okey-dokey.
[SIGHS]
I look like my mother.
♪ "M" is for the million
Things you gave me ♪
♪ "O" is-- ♪
Uh-oh.
Oh, look at that.
Shit.
Get! Come on.
Goddamn it!
Oh, God.
What the hell is this? Oh!
I need to talk to you.
You think you can you help me
with this? I kinda got stuck.
Here, just hold onto this.
When I say go, you pull.
All right. Go.
You've got Detroit
on line four.
Oh, my God.
I'll call back later.
That must be the girl Daryl's
been telling us about.
Oh, hell. Ah.
Uh, listen, Zorro,
uh, I think you're sweet
and everything--
It's Zora.
Zora.
Whatever. But, uh...
I'm not really into this
whole black-white thing.
Right now I got
myself a commercial to shoot.
But hey, let's stay in touch,
all right? Ciao.
ZORA:
But I need to talk to you.
It's really important.
Will you please
just listen to me?
I'll listen to you.
Does this make us ready?
Yes, we're ready.
What, he's wearing this?
He looks great.
What's with--?
What the hell is this?
Oh, here.
Hold that.
Ready to run
a rehearsal, everybody.
Boris should meet Hal.
Hal, you gotta meet the bear.
All right, I'll meet the bear.
Hello, bear.
I'm Hal Jackson.
Whoa!
Jesus Lord!
[GROWLING]
Whoa!
Down, Boris.
Good boy, Boris.
Get off.
Now pay attention.
You're gonna walk him past the
row of trucks with this chain.
Remember, keep your eyes
forward at all times.
And let me work the bear.
[BEAR GROWLS]
Uh-oh.
Eyes forward.
Good boy, good boy.
Down, Boris.
Eyes forward.
Do not touch the bear
on the back of the head.
And no whistling
whatsoever.
If you have to sneeze,
raise your hand.
Make a signal,
and I'll protect you.
[GROWLING]
No sudden moves.
Down, Boris.
Eyes forward
at all times.
No sudden moves.
Eyes forward.
No sneezing...
Boris is the only working
male bear in the country
with a full set
of teeth and claws.
Teddy!
What? Oh.
It's gonna look great.
Let's shoot the rehearsal
just in case.
DIRECTOR:
Shooting the rehearsal, people!
Is that big enough?
Can you read that?
Fine. He's ready!
[BEAR GROWLING]
Do it!
HAL: This is--
DIRECTOR: No, no! Cut, cut!
No closer, now.
You see that wire? It's hot.
It keeps Boris back.
Uh-huh.
This is Hal Jackson
from Jackson Motors
asking you to bear in mind
there's a reason so many...
I have to talk to you!
Not now, Teddy.
I need a flag set.
Teddy, handle this.
ZORA:
Do you hear me? No!
I have to tell you
this myself.
I need to have this
conversation with you!
I need to tell
you something.
Tell me, then. Whatever it is,
just say it, damn it.
You're driving me crazy.
[SIGHS]
You're my father.
What?
[GROWLING]
[ALL SHOUTING]
DIRECTOR:
Shoot it! Shoot it!
Get it!
Mother!
JOSE: Me, me, me, me!
Keep rolling.
Please call 911!
Nice bear!
That bear has never
done that before.
Except that once.
HAL:
Somebody, help! Please!
Oh, God!
Piece of shit car.
Where's the guy
with one arm?
Nice bear.
[ELECTRICITY BUZZING]
[LAUGHS]
Teddy!
I'm here for you,
babe.
It looks fabulous!
DIRECTOR:
Cut! That's a wrap, people.
This is bullshit.
I mean, you're black.
I'm white.
This is bullshit.
I know. I'm sorry.
I can't believe it either.
This whole thing
is horrible.
I've always been sort of light,
but, God, not this.
Well, there you go.
There you go. It's a mistake.
Oh. Ow!
Hell, look at that.
Shoot!
ZORA:
So you never
donated any sperm?
I didn't say that,
but for God's sake,
it was my understanding
the whole thing was anonymous.
Otherwise, I sure as hell
wouldn't have done it.
It was anonymous.
I just found the records.
What the hell's that supposed
to mean, you found the records?
I took the records
from the computer.
Well, goddamn it!
Don't you have any
respect for privacy?
Can I help you?
No.
Go on, shoo!
Don't you think a person
has the right to know
who her parents are?
No! No, I don't.
Besides, you got no real proof.
Stolen medical files
don't add up to a hill of beans
in my book.
Will you excuse me, Alberta?
Thank you, darling.
We could take blood tests
and find out.
You're missing
the whole point.
Look, suppose I am your...
Suppose I'm the, uh...
Suppose we knew that
I was the contributing party.
Why are you telling me this?
You need a spare kidney
or some bone marrow?
For chrissake, it was
conception in a plastic cup.
Look, you seem well-adjusted,
like a good kid.
I ain't got nothing
to offer you,
except maybe a deal
on a new truck
or extended warranty
and financing.
Otherwise, I'm sorry.
Yeah, right.
[♪♪♪]
WOMAN:
Hey, Sarah.
Hey, there.
[IMITATING RICKY RICARDO]
Lucy, I'm home!
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
These earrings are
a form of torture.
Okay, what's going on?
I'm just making dinner.
SARAH:
Just making dinner, huh?
ZORA:
I just wanted to make sure
that you knew
that even though we fight,
I think you're a great mom.
[CHUCKLES]
This is major.
[KNUCKLES CRACK]
Oh! I hate
when you do that.
I'm sorry.
Okay.
I'm up.
All right,
all right.
How many guesses
do I get?
All right.
Did James fall asleep listening
to that Judy Garland tape
and burn down
the bookstore?
[SIGHS]
All right.
You didn't get accepted
to MIT?
Are you pregnant?
Listen, stop.
Stop this.
Stop for one second.
Tell me
what's going on.
Ma, I found
my real father today.
He's a mean asshole.
What?
I found my father.
Wait a minute. Wait.
What does that mean,
you found your father?
I went to
the sperm bank,
got your file
from the computer,
and he's my father.
Ma, it was terrible!
Are you crazy?
I'm sorry!
What did you do?
I'm sorry!
Okay, I'm sorry.
Okay, come here.
Come here.
It's okay. It's okay.
It's okay.
Mommy's here.
It's okay. It's okay.
It's all right.
[SIGHS]
Um, Ma?
You haven't heard
the worst part.
What?
He's, um...
He's-- He's a car salesman.
Car salesman?
Yeah.
And, Ma, you're not gonna
believe this, but, um,
he's a white car salesman.
Wait a minute. Wh--
What do you mean, white?
He's like--
Like "white" white?
White, white, white.
You mean he's like a creamy
eggshell kind of tan?
No. Like white. Like totally
white. Like a white guy.
No. You mean that
he was so light
you thought
he was a white guy.
No, he's so light, Ma,
he is a white guy.
What do you mean, he's white?!
I'm sorry.
I didn't ask--
I didn't want no white--
What is he doing
being white?
I didn't ask
for a white man.
I distinctly asked
for a black man.
Did you see the guy?
Was the guy black?
Didn't I tell you
the man came in a tube?
He was in the tube.
I couldn't see anything.
You should've
asked to see him!
So kill me!
Kill me! Kill me! Kill me!
No, don't kill me.
I'll kill myself. How's that?
What do you mean,
he's white?
I can't-- Wait. Forget it.
It doesn't matter.
Okay.
It's no big deal.
Hell, your hair's
always been fine.
So what?
You're a little lighter
than me. Big deal!
Right. I mean,
Look at Lacie and Rissa.
They're both really light,
and both of their parents
are really dark.
They're my complexion.
Look at those kids
on the Cosby Show.
Oh, please.
You know they're mixed.
Well, of course
they're mixed.
Okay. Well, then, we can
never really tell.
Who's gonna tell?
Who cares?
Are you gonna tell somebody?
No!
I'm not gonna tell
somebody so let's eat.
Okay.
Okay!
Okay.
Ma, it's even worse.
Oh, please! What?
It's Hal Jackson.
Who?
Hal Jackson.
"Because real cowboys
are strong and tough,
and so are American trucks."
The schmuck on the television
with all the animals?
"Hal's your pal"?
That's my dad.
This is Hal Jackson
from Jackson Motors,
and this is Larry.
Larry and I just saw
Thelma and Louise together,
and we figure if those
two gals can see America,
it's high time we did too.
The old-fashioned way.
Behind the wheel
of a top-of-the-line
American vehicle.
Sit down there, Larry,
and grab the wheel.
Here, turn around
and grab the wheel.
There you go.
You're driving big, son.
So come on down
to Jackson Motors
and see the specials we got
going on cars and trucks.
Could change your life.
I know Larry's
gonna change mine.
Larry's my pal.
Don't forget:
Hal's your pal.
Well, give me five
here, Larry!
All right. Grab your pistola
here and let's go.
Adios, folks. Go on, you can
pick your nose later.
Grab the wheel.
Let's do some driving.
Ha, ha!
Idiot.
[♪♪♪]
Oh, Lord.
Stupid bear.
MAN [ON RECORDING]:
You are beautiful
because you are you,
unique and individual.
But maybe
you don't believe this
because your beauty
can't completely be seen.
Oh, Lord.
Maybe you have
unwanted extra weight.
Maybe bad skin.
Maybe poor posture.
Maybe facial hair.
Close your eyes right now
and visualize these
negatives disappearing.
See the new, more
beautiful you emerging.
[RECORDING STOPS]
Good morning. I need to
speak to somebody
in your records department.
We're looking for books
on weddings.
Her daughter Cindy's
getting married.
Ooh, finally!
Well, that's nice,
but I only carry books
with traditional
African ceremonies.
Well, that's a start,
I guess.
Yes, um, look,
17 years ago,
I purchased some...
Some, uh...
We can't find
the wedding books.
Mm-mm.
Over by the voodoo dolls.
Oh!
Sperm.
I bought sperm.
I asked for
an African-American.
I don't think that's what I got.
I filled out all of these forms.
Nobody seems to
be able to tell me--
Are the books in order of
subject matter or by author?
Author.
Who's the author
of the wedding book?
Babe, I'm on the phone here.
I don't know.
My life is hanging
in the balance,
and you wanna talk to me
about authors.
Just do your thing.
What thing?
Look, I just don't think
I got what I paid for.
Why? Why do all complaints
have to come in writing?
It's obvious to me
you people can't read.
Do the "urban bush woman"
t-shirts come in petite?
What exactly is
an urban bush woman?
Me! Me!
I'm an urban bush woman!
Oh.
This is not a mix-up.
A mix-up is when
you order hamburger
and get a cheeseburger.
or when you bring your clothes
to the dry cleaner
they give you
someone else's clothes.
What I'm talking about
is a major mistake in my life!
I hate it when the
dry cleaners make mistakes.
Oh, and they say
the chemicals in dry cleaning
are very bad for you.
I know.
Who are you people?
Shut up!
Get away from my counter.
I'm busy!
Go over there until I
finish this conversation.
And then I will help you.
Well, all right.
Now, listen, all you
have to do is--
Hello?
Damn it.
WOMAN 1:
Her attitude isn't very helpful.
WOMAN 2:
No, but her necklace
is very interesting.
[SERGIO MENDES'
"WHAT IS THIS?" PLAYING]
♪ Don't you know ♪
♪ This is like a flame
My brother ♪
♪ Don't you know this is
The music of the hour ♪
♪ Don't you know ♪
♪ This is like a flame
My brother ♪
Hey. Hey!
TEA CAKE:
I guess that explains
why you like that
surfing music shit, huh?
That is not funny, Tea.
That's messed up.
A white dude.
[BOTH LAUGH]
I should've
never told you.
No, that's cool.
Didn't dude say he could
get you a deal on a truck?
Yeah, right.
That's amazing, huh?
Yeah. I mean, there's
a crazy difference
between factory sticker
and what they charge you.
Big deal, Tea.
It is a big deal.
My parents are getting me
a car for graduation.
Look, I'm taking you down there
just to show you the place,
not to get you
a deal on a car,
so get over it,
all right?
You're just mad
because you're white.
Ha-ha! Shut up!
"Shut up!"
[HUMMING]
We're gonna crash.
♪ Don't you know this is
The music of the hour ♪
How many trucks
sold this morning?
[MUMBLING]
Aw, come on, folks.
First rule of sales:
enthusiasm.
Morning, darling.
JOSE:
Look at this.
Toyota
lowered prices.
All right.
How much?
Five percent
across the board.
Well, hell, that makes me
feel great!
Didn't make
any of us feel great.
That's because you're missing
the big picture, Jose.
They had to lower prices.
We got ourselves
a better product.
All you need
is conviction of belief.
I'll bet you $100
I can nail the next person
to walk through that door.
Oh! I'm in.
Hey, I can do that.
All right.
A little life in here.
Who's holding?
Paula?
I am.
There you go.
Contract signature from the
next person to step inside.
But if not, forget the money,
just lower prices.
HAL:
All right. How much you got
there, Paula?
[SPAGHETTI WESTERN
MUSIC PLAYING]
Piece of cake.
Hold that for me, will you?
Can I have my hat, Paula?
Hey, there!
I'm Hal Jackson.
Welcome to the best selection,
the finest-built cars and trucks
this side of Detroit.
Don't touch me.
Well, of course not.
No, ma'am.
Uh...
Hell, I understand
what's happening here.
There's a recession
going on.
I'll tell you what,
no down payment.
Now, you looking for
something special today?
Yeah.
Your head on a stick.
This is gonna be
a tough sale.
[CHUCKLES]
Well, now, uh...
Is it just trucks
you have a problem with,
or is it me?
Just you.
Say, are you
the young lady
who is from the animal
rights group?
No, I'm not.
I'm Zora Mathews' mother.
Oh.
Wow.
All right.
You wanna step
inside for a minute?
Yeah.
HAL: All right.
[CHUCKLES]
[HIP-HOP MUSIC
PLAYING ON RADIO]
Damn!
Check that out.
Maybe I'm making a mistake
getting a truck.
ZORA:
I think we might be making
a mistake by coming down here.
TEA CAKE:
It's kind of flashy,
but flashy can be good.
Hi, gorgeous.
Hi.
DIEGO:
You look better.
A lot better.
Flashy can also mean
you're a penis head.
This is Tea Cake.
You her little brother?
Kiss my ass.
Excuse me. Nice to meet you.
Let's get something
straight right now, okay?
There's no way
you're the father.
I knew there was
some kind of screw-up.
Yeah, well,
I ordered a black man.
Well, thank God.
So, what seems
to be the problem?
I'll tell you
what the problem is.
My daughter came to you
to pour her heart out
and you offered her
a kidney.
Now, who the hell
do you think you are?
Wait a second, lady.
She caught me off guard.
I donate an ounce
of sperm 18 years ago,
and today some kid wants
to call me daddy.
Excuse me. She does not want
to call you daddy.
Fooled the hell
out of me.
Oh, did it?
Why does that surprise me?
Because you are a fool.
You know what else you are?
You are the scum that
clogs up the cable stations,
and even
if you were black,
I wouldn't like you.
So you stay the hell
away from my kid, understand?
Now listen!
Who's following who around?
She came to me first.
I tell you what,
you keep her away from me!
Are you
giving me face?
What's the hell's that mean?
Ahem. Good morning.
Could I interest you--
No.
0 for 2.
Can I interest you in a test
drive of a new model car?
Well, yeah.
I'll look at whatever
you wanna show me.
Well, good. Why don't you
come this way?
...my daughter?
I had no intention of
judging you or your--
Ma.
Oh, great.
What are you
doing here?
Yeah. Good question.
SARAH:
The question really is,
what are you doing here?
Look, wait a minute.
Anyone mind if
I have a cigarette?
Yes, I do mind.
Ma, this is his office.
But these are my lungs.
Let him kill himself,
and not me.
How about a drink, then?
You got a problem with that?
No, I don't.
Why don't you make it two?
I don't believe this.
Ma, you never drink hard liquor.
What a shame.
SARAH: Make it a double.
HAL:
All right. One drink coming up.
You know, I noticed that
you're having a hard time
keeping yourself
in school these days.
I just wanted
to talk to Hal.
You know, a good education
is invaluable, young lady.
She knows that.
She's going to Berkeley
next fall.
I wanted
to go to Berkeley.
I got into MIT,
and that's my first choice.
Well, she doesn't really
wanna go
all the way to Boston.
Yes, I do really wanna go
all the way to Boston.
We can't afford it,
can we?
My science teacher is helping me
with scholarships.
Ah! She's always winning
stuff like that.
Look at her. She's so cute,
she's so smart.
Ma. Mom, don't start.
Sorry.
First you don't
want me to go to Boston,
now I'm winning
all these awards.
What?
Well, I just think you could
take all the awards you win
and use them in Berkeley.
This is really good.
ZORA:
Ma, I don't want
to go to Berkeley.
I wanted to go to Berkeley.
Who asked you?
The-- Never mind.
Can I have some more?
You've got to sit down
in this baby.
Just wait.
Ooh.
See?
I like this.
See?
That's a good color
for you.
Yeah. Yellow.
You're not feeling
too nervous
about buying a truck,
are you?
No. No,
not at all.
Good. Most men aren't,
I find.
You working now?
Yeah, yeah.
Good.
May I ask
where you work?
At a bank.
And what department
would that be?
Uh, deposits.
Deposits.
[SEAT BELT CLICKS]
And withdrawals?
No. Just deposits.
Oh.
Heh. Cool.
Key.
Ooh.
Nuts.
Isn't it?
♪ You put
Your right foot in ♪
♪ You put your
Right foot out ♪
♪ You put your
Right foot in ♪
♪ And then you shake it
All about ♪
♪ You do
The hokey-pokey ♪
Ma, let's just go home.
Let's go talk
about college.
I wanna sing.
That's a good idea.
Why don't you all go home?
Who asked you?
Ma, This is his office.
Now let's go.
I know this
is his office.
I know that.
Look at this place.
I mean, please.
Look at it.
Cheesy wood,
bowling trophies.
Western motif
makes me ill.
Of course!
And the titty sisters!
This is absolutely
his office.
And look,
green shag carpeting.
My fave.
And what's this?
Aah!
Hi. Look at you.
Look at her.
Oh, no.
Al, no.
Alberta, thank you, Alberta.
That'll be all, honey.
Yeah, okay.
SARAH:
Is that your mom?
ZORA:
His mom?
You got a problem
with my office?
No. It's just that
she hates shag carpeting.
Mom, let's go!
Please!
Don't apologize
for me.
I have a big problem
with him.
She can say whatever
she wants to.
She's got rights.
Why don't you
just butt out?
I'd love to butt out,
but it's my office!
You'd don't have to
keep repeating that.
I'm aware
we're in your office.
Mom, let's go home.
I'm not ready to go yet!
I have
a point to make here!
What? What is your point?
I'll tell you
what my point is.
My point is this:
We don't want you.
You don't want us.
Let's keep that clear.
You are not
the father.
And even if you were,
we still wouldn't want you.
Hell, she doesn't look
anything like me.
Well, thank God for--
[KNUCKLES CRACK]
I'm gonna sit down.
Ma, are you okay?
Huh?
Are you all right?
Yeah.
So, ahem.
Where'd you park?
Uh, down the sidewalk.
Oh, I do that too.
She rode
her bicycle.
Oh.
Well, maybe we ought to...
Yeah.
All right.
Here we go.
Thank you--
Thank you for having us.
Uh... Mm.
We're cutting
prices.
ALL:
Yes!
It's all right.
I don't like
white people.
ZORA:
Shh!
[HORN HONKING]
Hey, I think
I bought a truck. Whoo!
[HORN HONKING]
Stop it.
Say, I tell you what.
Why don't we put the bicycle
in the back of the truck?
I'll drive you
where you're going.
I told you,
I don't need any help. Goodbye.
[GRUNTS]
[BELL RINGS]
Zora, right?
Yes.
You kind of caught me
by surprise yesterday, Zora.
I want to apologize
if I hurt your feelings.
It's okay.
I'm sorry that my mom
showed up here.
No problem.
Goodbye.
Bye.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, shit!
Oh, Christ.
Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
Goddamn it!
[CAR ALARM RINGING]
SARAH:
What is wrong with you,
coming around
that corner like that?
Are you crazy?
Stop the car! Aah!
HAL:
Oh, look at that,
a parking space.
SARAH:
Goddamn it, pull the car over!
Just let me out.
Are you gonna unlock
the door, or what?
Come on and unlock this damn
door before I slap you!
I can't stand your ass!
Son of a bitch!
What is wrong with you?
What, are you crazy,
coming around that corner!
Where do you think you are,
in L.A.?
Goddamn,
crazy white people.
Hello there, folks!
Thank you very much
for the ride!
Do you mind if I come in
and drain the lizard?
If you drain the...
Does that mean
you have to go to the bathroom?
Uh-huh.
Fine. Come on in!
You crazy...
You locked us in.
WOMAN 2:
We were gonna call 911,
but then we started
reading books.
I'll take these.
They're fascinating.
WOMAN 2:
We'll take everything, and...
I am so sorry,
dear.
I really had no idea we'd done
so many awful things.
Hello.
Ladies. Hell of an idea.
Lock the customers in
till they buy something.
Wonder if that works
with trucks.
Ha, ha. Oh, my God,
look at this place.
Book city.
You read all this?
The bathroom's upstairs
on the right.
Oh, we haven't been
up there.
No.
There's nothing
up there to buy.
Oh.
Well,
we have a check
all made out for you,
including tax at 7 1/2 percent.
Oh, no, no, no.
It's eight and a half.
WOMAN 2:
Maybe you're right.
Who cares?
You're done.
Oh. Thanks. Heh.
Thank you.
WOMAN 2: That's great.
SARAH: Happy wedding.
WOMAN 1: Bye!
SARAH: Let me help you.
Bye-bye, ma'am.
WOMEN: Bye!
Bye-bye, ladies!
Bye.
Bye-bye, now.
WOMEN: Bye!
HAL: Whoo!
Black authors
up the wazoo.
Yeah, I read black authors,
you know.
Wilt Chamberlain book
changed my life.
[HAL CHUCKLES]
Oh, wait a second here.
Maybe I don't have to
go anymore.
Nope, there it is!
Little silvery feeling.
The call of the wild.
♪ Wild thing
You make my heart sing ♪
HAL: ♪ Wild thing ♪
[TOILET FLUSHES]
♪ You make my heart sing ♪
♪ You make everything ♪
♪ Groovy ♪
[♪♪♪]
HAL:
Is this the guy?
SARAH:
Is who what guy?
The guy.
The guy that was supposed to be
Zora's father but isn't,
because, you know.
Yeah. That's my husband,
Charles.
Charlie.
Looks nice.
Was he nice?
Yeah, he was nice.
HAL:
Never remarried?
Heh. No.
I mean,
what's the point?
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm divorced.
Twice.
Right now, I'm living
with someone.
Hmm.
HAL:
Never had any children.
Huh.
That Zora,
looks like a nice kid.
Oh, she's a great kid.
I don't know what
I would've done without her.
Family really is
the way to go.
HAL:
I live to enjoy myself.
Funny thing, sperm.
Well, what do
we got here?
"Jesus was a black man."
Well, at least you got
yourself a point of view.
Boy, must be a real bummer
having a half-white kid.
Fuck you.
Apparently,
we already did that.
You know what?
Get out.
You know, for being such
a free spirit,
you are surprisingly
uptight.
And you, not surprisingly,
are a pain in the ass.
It turns out that I have
a daughter I never heard about.
You don't have
a daughter.
I have a daughter.
You have a car dealership.
I thought we straightened
all this out.
Fine by me.
But are you sure
it's fine with her?
I mean, she's the one
that hunted me out.
Maybe she wants
to see me.
I don't think so.
Come on now.
I was always good
at math and science.
Maybe I had something
to do with that part.
You had nothing
to do with it. Nothing.
Do you understand me?
I understand you,
Your Highness.
See? I can't talk to you
anymore.
It's okay.
I'm out of here.
Mm-hm.
Have a nice life.
I will.
[DOOR CLOSES]
[♪♪♪]
Hi.
Okay. What's up?
You think
he's my father?
Look,
all he was
was some sperm
with one motivated swimmer.
That's all.
I just wish I could've asked him
a few questions.
Why? The man is so dumb,
what was he gonna tell you?
Forget it. It's over.
Leave it alone.
I know, Ma,
but you don't--
Please.
I really don't want to talk
about this anymore, okay?
Okay.
[SEWING MACHINE WHIRRING]
Ma, just one thing.
What?
When you were alone
with him,
did he say anything
about me?
Is it really
that important to you?
Yes.
Well, yeah, he did.
He said, uh...
That you seemed
really smart
and really confident.
He also said he thought
you were really beautiful.
Really?
Yeah.
Really?
I cross my heart. Yeah.
That's cool.
Good night.
Good night, my daughter.
I love you.
I love you too.
[CAT MEWS]
It's not true.
But it's cool.
This is Hal Jackson
of Jackson Motors,
asking you to bear in mind
there's a reason
so many people come to us
for deals on
cars and trucks.
There's no offer
I won't consider.
Oh, God.
Now I'm gonna wrestle with you
over the down payment--
Daddy?
Sarah?
Daddy! Oh, Daddy!
I found you.
They said
you were dead, but--
You should try this.
Hal. Hal,
you should try this.
Uh-huh.
GIRL [ON TV]
Don't you know me, Daddy?
I'm Sarah! I'm Sarah!
HAL [ON TV]:
The final price will be
shocking!
GIRL:
But I'm Sarah!
[CRYING]
MAN:
Yes.
Sarah!
My baby.
WOMAN:
Her Majesty, the queen.
["GOD SAVE THE QUEEN"
PLAYING ON TV]
My daddy.
Hello.
Hey, how are you doing?
All right.
Where's Zora?
Uh, she just left.
Oh. She go get lunch?
Um, you know,
she never really tells me.
I-- I don't know.
You don't know?
What do you mean
you don't know?
Where is she?
Don't ignore me.
You better tell me
where she is
or I'm gonna
rip out your trachea.
Oh, Zora.
Yeah, Zora.
She went down to
the car dealership.
What?!
She went. I didn't go.
Ow!
This is Hal Jackson
of Jackson Motors,
inviting you to come on down
and see the circus of deals
we got going on the latest model
cars and trucks.
Tiny, down.
[RINGING]
[TRUMPETING]
Don't forget, 10 percent back
means 10 percent more peanuts
in your pocket.
Isn't that right, Tiny?
Or did you forget again?
Ha, ha.
DIRECTOR: Cue Tiny.
Great.
Cueing Tiny.
[RINGING]
High-ho, Tiny!
Whoa, whoa.
Cut, cut, cut. Reset.
Reset, Tiny.
Resetting, Tiny.
What the hell you mean cut?
We're losing you
when Tiny rears up.
Okay, We're ready
to go again.
Oh, my God, she's back.
DIRECTOR: Concentration, Hal.
HAL: Uh...
Teddy, Give me
a cigarette quick.
You're talking to me--
Just shut up and give me
the damn cigarette, will you?
Take one.
[BICYCLE BELL RINGS]
Great.
Excuse me, excuse me,
excuse me.
MAN:
Hey, lady! Hello!
[TINY GROWLS]
[TINY TRUMPETS]
This is Hal Jackson
of Jackson Motors.
[BICYCLE BELL RINGING]
Whoa! Hey!
[BELL RINGS]
Whoa!
Ten percent back means
10 percent more peanuts
in your pocket.
Isn't that right, Tiny?
Or did you forget again?
Oh, no, no, Tiny.
[TINY GROANS]
HAL: Uh-oh.
[BICYCLE BELL RINGING]
ZORA: Ma!
Whoa. What's happening?
DIRECTOR:
Here we go again.
Alert the media!
What?
The press!
Call the press!
Uh, Ma, look.
[GRUNTING]
Oh, shit!
MAN:
Oh, my God!
[YELLING]
[BICYCLE BELL RINGING]
Stop ringing
the goddamn bell!
TEDDY:
We're right behind you, babe!
[ALL SHOUTING]
Oh, shit! Aah!
[HORNS HONKING]
[BICYCLE BELL RINGING]
Oh, shit!
Stop ringing the goddamn-- Ow!
[HAL GRUNTS]
Whoa!
DIRECTOR:
You better be shooting!
You cut, you die!
This is all fabulous!
[GRUNTS]
ALL:
♪ Hare Krishna
Hare, Hare ♪
Aah! Move!
Move! Move!
Oh, Lord, help!
Hal, it's Kimberly.
You never called.
Oh, hi.
[HORN HONKS]
Stop! Whoa! Whoa!
Oh, Jesus.
[MOTORISTS SHOUTING]
Coming through. Watch your feet.
Coming through.
[TINY TRUMPETING]
HAL:
Please, stop ringing
the goddamn bell!
Oh, Jesus!
[ALL SHOUTING]
[GASPING]
[BELL RINGING]
Ta-da!
[CROWD CHEERS]
[TRUMPETING]
Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you. I'm alive.
I'm lucky.
Thank you, baby.
Oh.
[TINY TRUMPETS]
TEDDY:
It wasn't my fault.
Wait! Wait till you see
the footage.
HAL: Shut up.
Two news crews showed up.
I'm alive. Thank you
Are you okay?
Yes, I'm fine.
Ma, not you.
Are you all right?
Do I look
all right to you?
Wait.
Hey, hey,
what are you doing?
The elephant
was following the bell,
your bell. This...
This goddamn bell.
It was?
Oh, shit.
Yeah. He was.
He was following
my bell?
I thought you were dead
at that intersection.
That was close, wasn't it? Yeah.
ZORA: Yeah.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
My bell.
You mean you ended up
in the water
because of my bell?
I'm sorry.
Wait, wait!
[CROWD LAUGHS]
You know something?
You can go to hell.
If I could follow you
I'll ring my bell
so you know it's me.
He's really pissed.
You're gorgeous
when you're wet.
[LAUGHS]
[HORNS HONK]
[TIRES SCREECH
THEN CARS CRASH]
Just take my word for it.
It was a disaster.
Goddamn disaster.
I hear elephants
can be very, very violent.
Plus, they're pregnant
for two years.
Two years.
Can you imagine that?
And then the baby elephant
comes out,
has this really
bristly hair.
Turn over. Unh!
HAL:
Stacy, honey,
my whole career's gone down
the toilet,
and you're talking about
pregnant elephants?
Aw, monkey man,
you're full of stress.
There's a point right here
in your hand
that if I squeeze,
close your eyes,
this isn't
going to hurt.
[BONES CRACK]
Ha!
Does that feel better?
That's better,
isn't it?
Ow.
Turn over again.
Ooh!
You know something?
If you did lose
your business,
you could always
take the time
to explore
your artistic side.
Like, I always thought
you had the hands
of somebody
who could be a surgeon
or play the violin.
But Stacy, honey--
I know what you're going to say.
Nobody listens
to the violin anymore.
That's true, but you could
make them do it
by playing it in a whole new
way, like, for example,
more bluesy, perhaps,
or... Rap!
Rap! Rap! Rap even!
You could do it
like a-- Oh.
Oh, sorry. I-- Oh.
Your head hurts,
doesn't it?
Do you want me to, um,
maybe sing you a song
or something?
Okay.
No. No, please don't.
It's a very nice song.
Music can be so healing.
This is the song.
♪ Dr. Long ♪
♪ Dr. Song ♪
♪ Nice song ♪
♪ Makes you feel better ♪
♪ Hum along ♪
♪ Warm chords surround you ♪
♪ Surround you ♪
♪ And make you strong ♪
♪ 'Cause you sit here
Singing ♪
♪ Nice ♪
♪ Long ♪
♪ Song ♪
[HAL SIGHS]
[♪♪♪]
[HORNS HONKING]
[TIRES SCREECH]
What's going on?
No, no, no.
Hold on a second.
Wait, stop the car.
I can explain.
I'm so glad you're here.
What's going on?
Are they repossessing
everything?
No! Nobody's
repossessing anything.
Everything's selling.
It was that whole Tiny thing
that went big.
You're a smash. Ha, ha!
Bobby, get over here.
What's happening?
Money, money.
We're making money!
Sign this.
It's beautiful.
They're just flying
out of here.
Hey, boss! Hey!
It's like you always said,
we got a better product.
If we can get them
into the door, they'll buy it.
It's you and that elephant lady.
You're on every news
broadcast in the city.
You're a hit, cowboy!
You're a hit!
Where's the lady?
Where's Tiny?
Who? Oh, the elephant.
Drowned, I guess.
[CRYING]
Sorry, little girl.
I didn't mean anything by that.
I'm just kidding
Uh, carry on. Carry on.
Well, hello, ladies.
Look at you all.
WOMAN 1: Over here!
WOMAN 2: Over here! Please!
I'll be damned!
[DOOR CLOSES]
Yes!
[♪♪♪]
BOBBY:
Let me just show you this truck.
This truck was made for love.
Look at the size of this cab.
You can give birth
in this cab,
and while you're doing it
you can listen to the radio,
AM, FM, UHF...
[♪♪♪]
So what time
are you done?
Well, I teach until 10.
You have dinner plans,
don't you?
Oh, yeah. We're all going out
and celebrating.
Good night, boss.
Good night, Bobby.
Unbelievable day.
We damn near sold
every car on the lot.
Mm.
Oh, that's nice.
All right.
I'll see you later.
Okay. Goodbye, baby.
Hi.
Mmm. Good.
You have
very strong hands.
Thanks.
Whoa.
Get out of here.
It's late.
I'm going.
[CHUCKLES]
Boy, I'll tell you,
huh?
Perfect night
for a celebration.
Ha, ha. Sure is.
Night.
Good night.
[IN JAMAICAN ACCENT]
Jamaica, man, this close.
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Night, chief.
Whoo!
Hey, Jose!
They wiped us out.
Whoo! I'm telling you.
[LAUGHS]
Stripped us clean.
Yeah!
So what are you
gonna do?
You gonna celebrate?
Oh, sort of.
Tonight's
my poker night.
You got any plans?
Yeah. I'm covered.
I'll see you, man.
All right. Good night.
Good night.
And what a night! Whoo!
Hell of a night!
Ha, ha.
[BEN E. KING'S
"IF YOU NEED A MIRACLE" PLAYING]
♪ If you need a miracle ♪
♪ Then what you got to do ♪
♪ Is have a little faith ♪
♪ To pull you through ♪
[ENGINE STARTS]
♪ No one can hide
This burning feeling ♪
♪ Feeling ♪
♪ It's as plain
As black and white ♪
♪ We're both prisoners
Of our freedom ♪
♪ Freedom ♪
♪ And the chains ♪
♪ Are way too tight ♪
♪ Oh ♪
♪ If you need a miracle ♪
♪ Then what you got to do ♪
♪ Is have a little faith ♪
♪ Have a little faith ♪
♪ To pull you through ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
Hey, Mrs. Mathews,
um, I'm a little
concerned.
Hey, it's like,
what do we actually know
about this guy that Zora's
going out with tonight?
Didn't you check him out
or whatever parents
are supposed to do?
Why are you still here?
Don't you have
any dignity?
You need to go home.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Get the door.
Oh, my God!
Hey, this is worse
than I thought.
What is?
Excuse me.
Oh, no, you don't,
miss thing.
You better
go put on a jacket.
Oh, no, you don't,
miss thing.
You better
go put on a jacket.
You better shut up.
Get him out of here
before I kill him.
Somebody get the door.
Is this how it is?
Is this how we living?
Okay. No, that's fine.
That's fine. Okay.
You can go
and flaunt your fun bags
any way you please.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
I just got one thing
to say to y'all.
Funbag flaunting
only leads to trouble.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Get the door.
Just remember
I said it, all right?
Yo, it's a white man
at the door.
Am I interrupting
something?
No. Um...
How are you?
HAL: I'm okay.
I brought something
for you and your mother.
Why?
Ma.
I'm not
really sure.
There you go. Ahem.
[RINGS]
[CHUCKLES]
[BELL RINGING]
I'm not good at,
you know, receiving,
and so I don't want
you to think
that I don't like it.
Which in your language means
thank you.
Yes. Thank you.
You're welcome.
"The world is waiting for you,
and here are a few maps
in case you get lost
along the way. Hal."
Thank you.
HAL:
You're welcome.
Well, yeah.
Well, I guess
I ought to be going.
I'll walk you out.
Hey, be cool,
man.
Yeah. Thank you
very much.
That was a really
nice thing you did.
She's thrilled.
Thank you.
So are we
getting along now?
Come on,
what does that mean?
I'm not sure.
I'm just checking.
[CAR RADIO PLAYING
POP MUSIC ON RADIO]
Hey, Diego,
what are you doing here?
Me, boss?
What are you doing here?
Hi. I'm Zora's mother.
Hi. I'm Diego.
Nice to meet you.
Thank you.
ZORA: Behave yourself.
TEA CAKE: Don't count on it.
Hi.
Wow.
Oh, thank you.
Shall we?
Yes.
Bye.
DIEGO:
You look great.
ZORA: And so do you.
She's wearing that?
That's exactly
what I've been saying!
Thank you.
HAL:
Hey, Diego, you have
her back here by--
She got a curfew
or something?
Tell her be home
by midnight.
You have her back here
by midnight!
Yeah.
ZORA: We will.
Have a good time,
you two.
DIEGO:
I hope you like to dance.
ZORA:
Oh, I love to dance.
Bye now.
Do you know him?
Yeah, yeah.
He works for me.
So if anything happens...
I'll fire his ass.
Okay.
So, what's up, baby? You wanna
slide out for a minute?
Well, no,
I really shouldn't.
Come on, baby. We'll go see
a movie or something.
Well, I'm just not really ready
for a commitment.
I just wanna
take you out.
I said no!
Bitch!
Your mother.
Well, heh.
You probably have plans
for the evening.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm gonna...
Go out and grab something.
What are you
gonna grab?
Eat. I wanna eat.
Oh.
If you don't have
any plans,
you can come along.
Do you want me to come?
Yeah. I think I do.
Okay. Well, then,
I don't have any plans.
Heh. You know
something?
You could have said that
right off the bat.
Yeah, but you could've
just asked me to dinner.
I have to go change.
[SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
Hey,
where's the, uh...
Where's the rice
and the noodles
and the fella that flips
the shrimp into his hat?
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
I shouldn't have
let you order.
Half this stuff
still looks alive.
That's the whole idea.
You know what?
When she was 7,
I gave her one of those
Suzy Homemaker oven things.
They come with
little mixes.
You're supposed
to make stuff. Not her.
She was not interested
in baking.
All she wanted to do
was melt stuff in the oven.
She gets that part from me,
you know?
I only use my oven
to dry my sneakers.
SARAH:
I believe that.
HAL:
Hmm. Hmm. What the hell.
No! No!
MAN: Uh-oh.
Oh, shit.
No, you're not supposed
to eat it like that.
Oh, God.
[ALL LAUGHING]
Oh, God.
You know, Jackson...
Oh, Lord.
I'll buy you
another one.
This is ours.
Here. Drink this.
Are you okay?
Oh, shit.
[SARAH LAUGHING]
He ate--
He ate a wasabi ball.
And now his mouth is on fire.
[LAUGHING]
I'm fine.
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to laugh,
but you're so funny.
I know that, now.
You...
[SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
Maybe just a little more.
[SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
She just told you,
"Silly move, white man."
[BOTH LAUGH]
Are you all right?
I'm fine.
You sure?
Mm-hmm.
You know,
you're all glisten-y.
I think
it's from the wasabi.
You might wanna try
the crab next time.
It's a little safer.
Yeah. No, next time,
I'm ordering.
That's
what's happening.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
[♪♪♪]
HAL:
The only thing I can ride
is a horse.
Not once have we shot a
horse commercial. It's crazy.
SARAH:
That's probably because you'd
look too good on a horse.
They've gotta make you look
like a wild man.
That's part
of the appeal.
Really?
Yeah.
[CHUCKLES]
I never thought
of it that way.
You smell good.
What?
You smell good.
It's just this lotion
I'm using.
May I?
May you what?
Smell you.
Thought
you already did that.
Oh, wow.
Oh, I could get lost
in that smell.
I could just
close my eyes,
and no one
would ever find me.
Oh, no. Ha, ha.
Somebody
would find you.
I don't know. Maybe you could
send up a flare.
[HAL CHUCKLES]
You smell like that
everywhere?
Ha, ha.
I really don't know.
I'm not in the habit
of smelling myself.
I can check
for you.
[SARAH CHUCKLES]
You're really something,
you know?
I'm just, you know,
I'm not used
to this kind of stuff.
Is this
how you sell trucks?
It's not like we haven't been
properly introduced.
I don't mean
to be crass,
but my sperm has been
in your body.
Oh, and where it goes
you figure you should follow?
Well, generally
I like to go first,
but in this case the little
fellas got there before me.
Oh. Uh-huh.
We have had the child,
Sarah.
We didn't have a child,
Hal.
I had a child.
I'd like
to make that up to you.
I just bet
you would.
[♪♪♪]
This could get
complicated.
Don't worry.
I've done it before.
I bet you have.
Oh, yeah,
you're slick.
I'll change.
[CHUCKLES]
No.
Don't.
What should I do?
Smell me.
[♪♪♪]
[GLASS BREAKS]
[SARAH GRUNTS]
[CAWING]
[BOTH CHUCKLING]
HAL:
Hello.
Diego, stop.
What's wrong?
I better go home.
It's getting late.
Let's go to my place.
You could stay over.
Are you crazy?
My mother would kill me.
Look, Diego, I like you,
but I hardly know you.
So let's get to know
each other better.
Please.
[TIRES SCREECH OUTSIDE]
What was that?
It was just the bed,
honey.
Just the bed.
Oh, Jesus.
Oh, hell. Where's my hat?
I got your shoe.
I don't know.
Where?
Right here.
Where's my damn hat?
My other shoe.
[MUTTERING]
Oh, jeez.
They're right behind me.
DIEGO:
Wait, wait, wait.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What's the hurry?
[BOTH MUTTERING]
Oh.
WOMAN [ON TV]:
Every time
you squeeze Thigh Master--
Hey!
Hi, honey.
Hi.
We're watching TV.
Look at that.
Oh, it's late.
Time got away from us.
What happened
to the lamps?
Uh, I guess they fell over.
I'll be darned, yeah.
[BIRD SQUAWKING]
Yeah, well, what were you
watching on TV?
Studs.
Talk show.
Well--
Talking. They were talking.
Studs talking together.
Okay.
Hey, huh? Ahem.
Well...
DIEGO:
Boss. Ahem.
Hal junior.
Jesus.
Oh. All right.
Here we go. All right.
We're out of here,
Diego.
Good night, Hal.
Good night, Sarah.
I'll walk you out.
HAL:
All right. That would be good.
SARAH:
Yeah.
Quite a family,
huh, man?
I mean, like mother
like daughter, huh?
Ha, ha.
You know what I mean?
Diego, you lay a hand
on that girl
and I'll kill you
personally.
Whoa.
What's it to you?
I'll tell you
what it is to me.
She's my daughter.
Daughter?
Oh, hell.
I bet you I'm late.
Good night, Diego.
[DOOR CLOSES]
SARAH:
Ooh, I'm tired.
[YAWNS]
So what did you do?
What? Ha, ha.
What?
You heard me, Ma.
What were you guys doing?
Doing?
Nothing.
Oh, really? So that's why
the house looks
like a cyclone hit it?
What are you
talking about?
Ma, you told me
to stay away from him,
but you can do whatever
you want with him?
Zora...
This is my father, Ma,
and he needs me,
not you.
My whole
entire life,
you brought me up
with this fantasy,
this ghost of Charlie,
then I finally bring home
something real,
and you wanna
take that away from me!
SARAH:
What are you--
What is going on?
Ma, I wanted this
for me, not you.
When this thing
doesn't work out
between the two of you,
where is that
gonna leave me?
[COUNTRY MUSIC
PLAYING OVER RADIO]
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
HAL:
Sorry I got hung up, sweetheart.
Oh, hi, Hal.
You remember Bruce,
don't you?
Bruce gave me
a lift home.
Sure. Well,
thank you, Bruce.
No biggie.
Hey, have a seat, man.
Where were you?
Oh, I was just out
driving around.
I lost track of time,
honey.
Oh.
I gotta cruise.
Oh, no, no.
You gotta?
BRUCE:
Yeah. I gotta.
I hear that.
I'm beat.
Hey, the night's
just starting to cook.
I'm going to hear a new band,
Stinky Nightgown.
Stinky Nightgown?
Oh, you like them?
STACY: Oh, sure.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
We got all their stuff.
They're gonna record
as soon as the drummer
gets out of rehab.
Hey, you dudes wanna
hang with us tonight?
No problem.
Hey, why don't you go,
sweetheart?
I'll bet
you'll enjoy that.
Oh, wow.
You don't mind?
Hell, no.
I want you to go.
Thank you, sweetie.
Ha, ha.
BRUCE:
Let's fly.
Oh. Have one of those sex dreams
about me tonight, okay?
Okay.
You're welcome.
He had this dream
where he was a big, stupid dog
and I was
a little smart dog.
BRUCE: I like dogs.
[STACY IMITATES BARKING]
[LAURA SATTERFIELD &
EPHRAIM LEWIS' "I KNOW I DON'T
WALK ON WATER" PLAYING]
♪ Why ♪
♪ Do angels fall ♪
♪ Are they
Letting go of heaven ♪
♪ Are they
Letting go of heaven ♪
♪ Or learning well
How to fly ♪
♪ Hey, hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ A lasting love ♪
♪ Is trouble out the door ♪
♪ Trouble out the door ♪
♪ And sweeter
Oh, here today ♪
♪ I know
I don't walk on water ♪
♪ Well, forgive myself ♪
♪ For the way I've been
For so long ♪
♪ Oh, I know
I don't walk on water ♪
♪ But I do believe
Love is the only color ♪
♪ Hey ♪
Ten percent off sticker,
Charlie.
Hey, everybody.
Hey, my favorite chief.
Good morning.
Oh, my God.
What a beautiful scarf.
You gave it to me.
Christmas '83.
Did I? You know something,
Alberta?
You work too hard.
Take the day off.
Really?
Do it now. Run!
I'm feeling good.
[CHUCKLES]
Great.
Hi.
I was thinking
about last night.
Oh, Lord. Me too.
I'm, uh...
I'm talking about Zora.
She was really very
upset about...
This. Us. Uh...
Why?
Well, just because nobody's
ever come between us before.
Well, sweetheart, I--
I didn't wanna come
between you and Zora.
Well, I know that,
but, uh, you have.
Well, how?
Wait, uh--
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
What did she say?
It doesn't matter
what she said.
This would be so much easier
if you were a parent.
Then I could explain it.
Wait a minute.
What is this?
Something feels
really off here.
Well... Ahem.
Look, Zora's
really upset,
and you couldn't
see her upset
for any longer
than you could take it.
And this is as long
as I could take it for.
All right, all right, uh...
Let me talk to her,
all right?
What are you
gonna say?
Huh?
You gonna explain--
What you gonna say?
Hey,
what's the big deal?
Come on, Hal,
what was this?
This was nothing
but some kind of...
Some kind of what,
Sarah?
Well,
just some sort of,
you know,
attraction,
some weird
old attraction.
Let's just
get out of it
before
somebody gets hurt.
All right.
Oh, okay.
I see what this is.
What?
You can go on with your
little speech if you want,
but this is bullshit.
What do you mean,
this is bullshit?
Don't give me your
motherly crap about Zora.
What's going on
is you got scared.
What do you mean I got--
Wait a minute. You know what?
Just back off.
Oh, yeah, right.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, right.
Just back off, right?
Walk away,
make your life easy.
You think you can control every
goddamn thing, don't you?
Hell, you can even have a kid
without even meeting a man.
All you gotta do is put
a bunch of pictures on the wall
and call it "Daddy."
I got news for you.
It doesn't work that way, Sarah!
I got news for you too.
You stay away from us!
That's what we both want.
You just stay away from us!
Hey, I got a say in this too,
goddamn it! I'm her father!
♪ I know I don't
Walk on water ♪
♪ But I do believe
Love is the only color ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh,
Oh, yeah ♪
♪ Daddy told her why ♪
Thought
I told you to go.
I'm going.
♪ Like bolts across the sky ♪
♪ Mama held her ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Daddy told her why ♪
[TIRES SCREECHING]
[HORNS HONKING]
[TIRES SCREECH]
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Time ♪
♪ Will steal your life ♪
[SIRENS WAIL IN DISTANCE]
♪ So hang on
To your soul, girl ♪
♪ Hang on to your soul, girl ♪
♪ I know I don't
Walk on water♪
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
Zora.
I'm sorry.
I can't think of
anyplace else to look.
Have you seen my mother?
[SIREN WAILS]
I'm looking
for my mother.
Sarah Mathews?
Check at the desk.
Excuse me. We're looking
for a Sarah Mathews.
Sir, Sarah Mathews,
please.
Are you family?
This is her daughter.
Oh, she came into ER
this morning.
We are sustaining
her vital signs.
She has a concussion,
and she's still unconscious.
We operated on her leg
this afternoon.
Ma.
She's gonna be okay,
right, doctor?
DOCTOR:
The next 48 hours are critical.
[♪♪♪]
Mr. Jackson,
Ms. Mathews,
at this time we ask
the family and friends
to make a blood donation.
Honey, why don't you
go first?
Come on. I'll take you.
It's just
right down the hall.
Don't worry.
It's gonna be okay.
DOCTOR:
Did you see that doll
in here right before you?
Mm, mm, mm. Coffee with just
the right touch of cream.
Whoo, was she hot.
My palms are still sweating.
Blue jeans and red top?
Her butt was a 10.
You saw her?
She's my daughter.
And the interesting thing
is she's AB negative.
It's not very common.
Well, she's an unusual girl.
She won a science award
last year.
State contest.
First prize.
You don't say.
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
[♪♪♪]
I mean, it was really
an awful fight,
and then...
Well, I guess it's just like
what you're afraid of.
That you'll--
You'll yell at someone
and fight with them,
and then they'll die
or whatever.
I know.
Well, I had a fight
with her too, though,
so we'll never really know
which fight got her run over.
[CLEARS THROAT]
One thing we
do know though is,
neither one of us can
ever fight with her again,
which is too bad because
she's so damn good at it.
Heh-heh, yeah.
Hal, you can
fight with me.
You just can't win.
Hi.
Well, look.
You brought the asshole.
[CHUCKLES]
My foot hurts.
I think she's okay.
Well, maybe I ought to leave you
two ladies alone for a second,
go home
and grab some clothes.
I'll be back real soon.
Okay.
Aren't you gonna
smell me goodbye?
Better make it two.
Yeah.
I think there's
hope here.
Yeah.
You should have called, man.
You should have called.
Hal. Hal,
we need to talk.
Oh, I don't think
we need to talk, sweetheart.
That was never
really our thing, was it?
You can get down
on your knees to me.
I'm still breaking up
with you.
Well, I think you should
break up with me.
Bruce is better for you
than I could ever be.
No, I don't think
you understand
what I'm trying to say.
It's over between us,
so don't try
and stop me.
Okay. I won't.
What happened to us, Hal?
Oh.
Where did we go wrong?
I mean, we were going
to buy a dog together!
A terrier,
or maybe a lab.
Boy, I sure am lucky
I found out about you
before we wrecked
his little life,
or we had to fight
over splitting him up.
Let's not keep Bruce
waiting, all right, honey?
Yeah.
Okay.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
Don't hate me, Hal.
Please don't hate me.
I want you to just
remember the good times.
I want you to remember
the way we were.
Okay. I will.
Bye-bye.
Thank you, honey.
Ooh!
Hal!
Hal, you'll find
somebody else!
I know you will!
Maybe not right away,
but in the long run I think
this is for the best.
You know, someday
I think you'll thank me.
[SOBBING]
[DOOR CLOSES]
It's going to take
him a long time
to get over this.
We're talking years. Bye.
BRUCE:
Poor dude.
Bye. Bye, Hal.
Oh, God.
Good morning.
Morning. Just the man
I need to see.
I need to talk to you
for a second.
Sure. Hello, darling.
NURSE:
Hi, Mr. Jackson.
[ZORA & SARAH
SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
Hey. Come here. Come here.
Quick, quick, quick, quick.
Go ahead. Go ahead.
Ma.
What?
What's going on?
I won a Westinghouse
science award.
They only give out
10 each year.
That's 10
in the whole country.
Yes. And the principal's
gonna give it to me
next week at graduation.
Isn't that something?
I'm telling you,
this is our baby.
Our baby's getting
this incredible award.
Yes. They're gonna give me
a trophy or something,
and they'll pay for
my whole college tuition.
Congratulations, sweetheart.
That's wonderful.
Thank God.
How about that, huh?
What's wrong?
Well, I just--
I've just come from
the hematology lab.
Ooh. Why?
Well, that's where they
keep all our blood.
You're type A, Sarah.
Sweetheart, they want you
to give some more blood.
You're AB-negative,
and that's kind of rare.
And they took
some of mine too.
And I'm O.
You couldn't be.
They did it twice,
honey,
and I'm O.
SARAH:
Heh. Wait a minute.
What are you saying?
Well, it turns out
that I'm not her father.
[CHUCKLES]
But I got the name
from Mom's file.
They had your name
at the sperm bank.
I know that, sweetheart.
I called.
I talked to the fella
that runs the place.
He said the that files
were done by hand
up until about 10 years ago,
when they sent them overseas
to be put on computer disks.
When they came back,
they were all messed up.
Well, I jus--
How can--? How can they
do that to people?
I'm afraid that the most
you're ever gonna know
is that the donors came
from the university.
Mostly science majors.
You're not my father.
No.
[SIGHS]
I made a mistake.
I made a horrible,
horrible mistake.
[SOBBING]
Should I go talk to her?
Mm-hm. No.
She just-- She just has
to be alone for a while.
Well...
I guess you probably wanna go
back to work or something.
You probably
need your rest, huh?
Yeah.
Okay, then.
SARAH:
I, uh...
I don't think
I thanked you
for being there
for Zora and me.
I wanted to be there.
I gotta go
to Las Vegas tomorrow.
Ahem. I have
a dealer's convention.
Sounds fun.
It's work.
I'll call you
when I get back.
Okay.
Sarah, I'm sorry.
Me too.
[♪♪♪]
[DOOR CLOSES]
Hey!
Miss Westinghouse Award!
[CHUCKLES]
♪ Go, Zora
Put your thing down ♪
♪ Congratulations
You won a Westinghouse ♪
So what'd you get?
Free light bulbs and stoves
and microwaves and shit?
[CHUCKLES]
Schnobloink.
Thanks.
Hey, what's wrong?
[SIGHS]
He's not my father, Tea.
[SOBBING]
And, you know,
the worst part...
is I wanted a dad.
And he was my dad.
Come here.
I'm sorry, baby.
ROCKWELL:
Ideanna Jordan.
[CROWD CHEERING]
Erica Franklin.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
Sam Fuller.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
Marilyn Taylor.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
Erica Johnson.
Tina Nichols.
[CHOIR SINGING]
Horatio Vasquez.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
Thank you, sir.
Thank you.
TEA CAKE:
Hi, Mom!
Um...
I, uh, guess the cool thing
about giving this award is
that I get to give it
to my friend.
Well, my best friend,
actually.
Zora's going to MIT
this fall.
[CROWD CHEERING]
And I'm sure she's gonna
make their heads spin
just like she did ours.
There are certain people
that just bring out
the best in others,
and, well,
as you all know,
I ain't one of them peoples.
But Zora Mathews is,
and that's why
I take great pleasure
in presenting
this Westinghouse Award
to my best friend
Zora Mathews.
They said
I should say something.
If I've done well in school,
it's because I got
the message at home
that learning was important.
[CROWD CHEERING]
I'd like to accept this award
in the name of my mother.
She has made it
her life's work
to educate people.
And I am so lucky
to be one of them.
May we give her the plaque?
Could you come up,
Mrs. Mathews?
Stop it! Stop!
[♪♪♪]
HAL:
Excuse me.
WOMAN:
Oh!
HAL:
Sorry. Excuse me.
I'm sorry.
WOMAN: Ow!
HAL:
Oh! I'm sorry, miss.
Whoa, open-toed shoes.
I'm sorry.
Excuse me. Coming through.
Coming through here.
Excuse me.
[CHUCKLES]
What are you doing here?
I'm not sure.
I mean...
I wanted to see...
You know.
Your daughter graduate.
Yeah.
I also thought maybe, uh...
you might need a hand
going up the stairs.
Oh. Absolutely.
Heh, absolutely.
[♪♪♪]
[CHUCKLES]
This is my mom.
And...
Your dad.
And my dad.
I now pronounce this class
graduated!
And congratulations
to you all!
[ALL CHEERING]
Whoo!
[LAUGHING]
TEA CAKE:
Wait! Hold on, hold on.
Chill, chill!
Stay in your seats!
We have something
that we planned
that we'd like to give you.
[IMITATING ARSENIO HALL]
And it goes a little
something like this! Aha!
[DRUM ROLLS]
♪ Stand, get up
Whoo-whoo ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Stand, get up
Whoo-whoo ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Stand
Gonna reach my goal ♪
♪ Like Barkley
Better clear the lane ♪
♪ You can't stop me
From goin' all the way ♪
♪ S-T-A-N-D ♪
♪ Yeah, because only I
Control my D-estiny ♪
♪ Ain't nothing negative
Gonna break me ♪
♪ Not crack, coke
Or an uzi ♪
♪ I want to tell you ♪
♪ You can't forget
About the HIV ♪
♪ Because that's
Another thing ♪
♪ In your life to cheat ♪
♪ New York to Japan ♪
♪ Everybody in the world ♪
♪ Stand
Standing here ♪
♪ In the end ♪
♪ Just still be you ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ When that's done ♪
♪ All the things
You've set out to do ♪
♪ Aah ♪
♪ Stand ♪
♪ There's a cross ♪
♪ For you to bear ♪
♪ Because you're
Goin' through ♪
♪ If you're going anywhere ♪
♪ Get up ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Stand ♪
♪ They were trying
To make you grow ♪
♪ ♪And they know
What they're saying ♪
♪ Makes sense at all ♪
♪ Just stand ♪
♪ And you know ♪
♪ That you are free ♪
♪ That you'll expand your mind
If you want to be ♪
♪ If you want to be ♪
♪ Want to be, my friend ♪
♪ Stand ♪
♪ Everybody just ♪
♪ Stand ♪
♪ Brothers ♪
♪ Sisters ♪
♪ Stand ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Get up, whoo ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Stand up, stand up ♪
♪ Stand up
For me, brother ♪
♪ Stand up
For me, sister ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, na ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Stand up, stand up ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Stand up, brother ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Stand up, sister ♪
♪ Stand up, my friend ♪
♪ To the end ♪
♪ Gonna reach my goal
Like Barkley ♪
♪ Better clear the lane
You can't stop me ♪
♪ Goin' all the way ♪
♪ S-T-A-N-D ♪
♪ Yeah, because only
I control my D-estiny ♪
♪ Ain't nothing negative
Gonna break me ♪
♪ Not crack, coke, or an uzi ♪
♪ You can't forget
About the HIV ♪
♪ Because that's
Another thing ♪
♪ In your life to cheat ♪
♪ From New York to Japan ♪
♪ Everybody in the world ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Oh, stand up ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Stand up, now ♪
♪ Always hold
Your head up high ♪
♪ And stand up ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Always hold
Your head up high ♪
Zora! Come here!
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Oh, stand up ♪
TEA CAKE:
Whoo!
♪ Stand up ♪
♪ Oh, stand up ♪
♪ Just stand up ♪
[ALL CHEERING]
♪ It's the powers of love ♪
♪ They're more
Than a rainbow ♪
♪ Deeper than we can see ♪
♪ It's the feelings that grow ♪
♪ It's more than
A heart's love ♪
♪ Greater than you and me ♪
♪ The colors of love ♪
♪ Ooh, love ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ We got the funk ♪
♪ Pop it in your trunk ♪
♪ Del ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Made where? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Made where? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Where that at? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Made where? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Where that? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Made where? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Where? ♪
♪ Made in America ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Yeah, we got the funk ♪
♪ We got the funk ♪
♪ Yeah, we got the funk ♪
♪ Funky Homosapien ♪
[♪♪♪]